Designer: Yours Truely


You've Just got to know that I'm named Belinda.
I love God ,SHC & Japan. OF course, Bro & Sis in Christ.
I hate all the sadness you've brought upon my life.
But im nice & forgiving, In your dreams.

if both of us are to cry, I want to be the one who cries louder,I want to be the one who takes a longer time to recover.
I want to absorb all the sadness from you..I'm holding on but you've already let go.

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Flipped those Pages: May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009

i weigh, 250 pounds
and stands at 2.5m tall.

Planning for my life already, My future.
Of course, aiming for the best, ( Might get disappointed, who knows. )
but, Im Entrusting my Life in God's hand : D

Interactive Media Design, 17 pts.
Here i come : )
Then, army(?)
Probably. : ) Get a diploma first. teeheehee.

Jun Yamamoto from Special A !!!

kawaiii desu!!! : D : D .

(the most top top top guy! )

Isn't he cute? AWWW.

&&, had stomachache today ) :

wonders how tmrw will be like. teeheehee.

How weird, after watching shugo chara, i find other animes boring -.-
Even those that are new to me. NUUU.
whats happening ) :

LOTTA LOVE LOTTA LOVE.
oh, please have season 3 ._.

She sits alone,A single tear
Stuck halfway Down her cheek,
She holds his picture
In her fragile hands,As a second tear
Breaks free and Rushes to meet the first,
The two merge As she drops the frame,
They race towards Her chin,Where they cling
For a moment,The frame crashes
On the floor, Shattering the glass
And distorting his face,As she stands,
The tears fall from Her chin And land on the
Broken, Shattered frame,Without looking back,
She steps outside,
Into the sun ...

---


Blood runs down my face and neck, traveling deep down into the dark abyss of unknown territory. My heart beats rapidly, fluttering almost, like the wings of a butterfly that are trapped in the web of a predator.
I see you looking at me, and my mind already in a perpetual state of confusion, begins to spin ‘round and ‘round, leaving me dizzy and disoriented.
Almost instinctively, my body begins to move towards you, as if there was some gravitational force deep down inside your core that had a vice-like grip on me and would not let go.
I suddenly find myself face to face with you and it’s everything I’ve every dreamed of and more. My breathing starts to quicken, and it becomes somewhat like a tribal dance, following a slow, steady, rhythmic beat.
You hold me, gently, as if I’m a fragile glass doll and you’re terrified of breaking me and having to stay and pick up the broken pieces.
You tell me that it’s over, that there’s no “us” anymore, and my brain just can’t seem to register the words that threaten to make my world come crashing down.
I’m in a state of pure shock and confusion that I can still see your lips moving, but they’re emitting no sound.

Those lips, those lips which I had so lovingly kissed, those lips which had gently brushed across my forehead before telling me goodnight.
Those were the same lips which were betraying me now.
All of a sudden, I felt like a tiny ant, crushed by an invisible force much bigger than I was, and I feared that the damage would be irreparable.
My soul is free and wandering, as I leave my shell to decompose into the ground and never be seen again. There is no blood pulsing through my veins, no steady heartbeat to remind me that I’m still alive.
My heart is shattered in a million pieces, pieces that slowly dig deeper and deeper into my heart, slowly killing it.

You left me in such a fragile state, and as my spirit floats away I think about how my broken mold will not plague me with regrets or attached pain.
I have broken that chains that held me down, that inhibited my development, but they will never find their way on me again.
----


Darkness touches the sky,Another day gone by.
Bottled up inside, all the feelings you choose to hide.
Shadowed memories of broken dreams...
Shattered love stories ripped at the seams.
Unspoken promises led you astray,
spoken dreams taken away.
Set your heart free and allow it to hurt...
If shut off from feeling, than what is life worth?
The risk may be great,the sacrifice real,
still the unspoken promises carry the seal.
And the spoken dreams may be foolish,and still...
There's nothing in life greater
than the love you can feel.

----


i've got a picture in my head, and it's meand you; we are in bed, and we're laughing.flashback to the days we held hands andsang songs we didn't know and pretendedthat this would last forever.
see the tangled webs we weave, hand overfist over head, tattered lies and faded silkand i-don't-know-who-to-trusts. we triedso hard and made it this far and i'm not aquitter despite everyone who saysotherwise and i promise i'm not giving up.i don't know where to turn and who toturn to or where i should place the trustthat people take and break and smile withbarbed words and acid lips and handgrenades.
i see the sun but i cannot feel it, i hearyour words but cannot speak. i hide behind this smile and pretend thisdoesn't hurt, pretend i cannot cry andi swear that this time, i promise, i won't give up.
see the webs the lies the crippled brokenties, see the horror see the fear see theangel standing here. see my pain see mytears hear the screaming in your ear. i tryi cry i die i lie i break a little more inside each time you tell me something's wrong,i pretend i do i swear it i'll be okay butone day the pretending will not make mebetter will not mend the tears will not keep me sane and i promise i won't let you see it.

i'm not laughing anymore.

-----


As I lay in bed
Awake at night
I let my mind go
My thougts run free
I remember the good times
But mostly the bad
Then the tears come
Leaving streaks of salt
Down my face
I remember laughing and smiling With you
Now all I know is tears and crying Without you
This is what happens
When I lay in bed
Awake at night
And let my mind go
And my thoughts run free

--


My nowhere home cries to me
Insulting my tired tears
I am shamed

Delluded memories scratch
Tearing at my fading love
I am breathless

Every reality in me
Morphs into sickly pain
I am lost

But knowledge grown from seeds of time
And the light of pure humanity
Shine in me
I am strong I am me I have hope

On phone,

Chingching : Have you forgotten it all? Every single thing, Answer me will you ?

Daniel : -silence-
.

Put this situation in your own shoes. Imagine that you are Chingching, How will you feel? : )

My life's back to normal again.
One. Zero. O. Five.
comeon, its gone.

Eating alot again. .

坐在这角落心里
很多话想说
我和你的错
就是舍不得放手
伤害你的我
早就应该让你自由
知道我以后
需要一直往前走
也许是越在乎
越会彼此的伤害
这样的爱情
又算是什么

爱不在
应该让自己从回忆中离开
爱不在
我们都已不存在彼此未来
有时候
对爱有太深太
多倚赖好像
你失去在这世界
还能够独单的自由

是曾经有的梦
现在只剩一场空
心里好多疑问
你忘了你的承诺
伤了自已也没有用
眼泪无言的流下来
迟早还是要面对
这段感情的伤痛

是因为越在乎
给彼此伤害更多
有了距离以后
看不透的你和我

爱不在
应该让自己从回忆中离开
爱不在
我们都已不存在彼此未来
有时候对你
还是会有关怀
可是心里已经太明白
不是爱

爱不在
应该让自己从回忆中离开
爱不在
我们都已不存在彼此未来
有时候不管对爱有多少的倚赖
就算再不愿意再伤心
我明白
我们只能放手
爱不在...................

: ) RANDOMS!

waiting for anime to load. BORING!

Gonna sleep late tonight again. perhaps. : ) ...

Feeling better, Perhaps too. : ) ....

ohwell. Tmr will be a better day..

-

should i change to this kind of specs? : D

I need a blog to talk to.
Humans doesnt help at all. Neither does blog, but who cares.
At least it doesnt give me comments that saddens me.
Worse, Day, Ever.

Lighter weights.

Just to inform you, this following post is gonna be very hurtful for most of your eyes
cause i've gotten a feeling that not alot of you will like it. : )
so, if you dont wanna see. please kinda wait till a few days later and visit this website again. : D

AND HOR, I VERY SAD SIA, I HEARD MY ANIME NO SEASON 2.
DAMN SHAG ONE SIA T.T
WHEN I WAS SO LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.

ok. so my all time favourite anime is ...........
....
.
..
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

ITAZURA NA KISS!!!!!!!!!

emer's addicted to it too. : P .

On, ROMANCE!!!!

--

2ndly....

.

.

Kamichama Karin!

Oh, this show just simply rocks. even though the starting is screwed ; )

I love the story line. ( kenneth sucks, he says it sucks)

On, Godforms, Transformation, action. ROMANCE...

anyway! more pictures!

(DONT THE GUY LOOK CUTE? )

THEY LOOK SO CUTE....

( they are not getting married, it's just they transformed form )

Oh, this is from the manga season 2 i think : /

kazune look so hot here, karin looks so cute. : >

-----

And, !

HAPPINESS!

-

Watched this not long ago, haven finish : )

but loving it.

(on , magic, romance )

---

and, INUYASHA. but, no picture. : P

Pissed off with some stuff today. But overall.
Its ok. Someone cheered me up. somehow. Or am i thinking too much?!
Teeheehee -.-

Ok. Let me Write a story, and YOU read it! : D
---

Cast :
Kat ( I )
Benedict ( Kat's Boyfriend )
Jacee ( Friend )
Marcus ( Friend )
Keith ( Friend )
Along the way, there will be random people.


.


Every once in a while, I will dwell back upon what happened, It all seems like yesterday, the memories are still etched Vividly in my tiny pea sized brain. Guess that's the only thing that fits.

Thank God that Im still with my beloved Boyfriend, Benedict. Yup, We've been dating for 6 years. Back to the story,
(5 years ago )
Which was, 5 years ago. I had this "best" Friend, Jacee. She was popular with boys, All the guys will go bonkers seeing her. The worse thing that made me Fume up was that, SHE WAS TRYING TO GET CLOSE TO MY BOYFRIEND, flirting and all that!
One day i thought, I am going to go all truthy to her that she's Flirting around too much!
But of course, I believed in Benedict, He's such a sweetie, as and when Jacee went to find him, he would just answer, and come to me instead. We've gone through so much in this short span of 1 year being together.
Oh yes, Did i mention? My Two other Guy friends, Marcus and Keith Are way crazy over Jacee, Its as though she's a top model, celeb or something. I just dont get it, There are so many other Pretty Hot Hot girls out there. Why Jacee? Why her? Why my BEST friend? Why does she show off to me SO SO MUCH on the number of guys chasing her? It makes no sense, I can't talk to my boyfriend about this, He'll think too much again. Yes, Couples should be Truthful and open about anything, But this is RIDICULOUS on How or WHY i am feeling this way about Jacee. Crap!

Let me tell you how much Keith and Marcus did for Jacee, AND ITS NOT ONLY THEM.
K, Starting with Keith, When Jacee's bored, Keith could just skip his Sports meeting and go over to Jacee's Apartment Accompaning her, heard that they did something together... With Jacee style, Its common, And Keith has NO idea how to cook, Yet when Jacee said she love guys who can cook, HE IMMEDIATELY dialed up a Community centre and Sighed up for Cooking class!Jacee was just laughing her ass off when she told me this, and i Laughed along, How could one sacrifice so much for someone that doesn't even have the same feeling towards him? WithOut fail, Valentine's, Jacee's Birthday, National day, Mooncake festival, Christmas, New year, there will be gifts costing a bomb just for JACEE.....

Bout Marcus, He's aggressive. Likely... when he went over to her apartment, Something already happened too? Im hoping that they'll get aids. But i think that, Marcus has a chance to win Jacee's heart, He's cute, He can cook(Chef), He's smart, He's Talented(Piano, Guitar, Drum),Rich(Father owns 5 lands in Regions of Europe), An ideal boyfriend to all woman.

All i felt was Jealousy, How can one go so Crazy for a girl? especially when I AM better than Jacee, IN MANY WAYS. I can study, Im good in sports, Im musically talented, I do housework. Guess benedict's Lucky? (Smiley). Seeing so many Useless guys flirting around with her, A tiny little bit of jealousy is hard to escape from. But my Boyfriend.. Through this one year, He has shown me, what true love's all about, I Love him to the Max!

(4 years ago )
Finally, One day, Benedict saw through me, He's one, who truely understands and cares for me, Nothing could escape from his eyes. I Opened up to him on how i was feeling, my first instinct of his reaction would be " why do u even care about other guys when you already have me ? ", but no, his words touched me.. " No matter how much you look at others guy, Even if you feel like being with them, Even if you have lost this feeling that we once had, I Just want to tell you, I'll wait for you, Till i am truely, the only Man in your eyes. " ...

From that moment, I felt convinced, That God Put benedict into my life, has a purpose, God Sended him to change my life, my thinking, my ways.
Without hesistation, I Hugged Benedict, he was all i wanted, Afterall. And yes, I muttered....
" I will never let you go. So, Stupid, Dont ever let me go too ".
"I promise, i won't. " .
It all just feels so blissful.

Back to Now,
Jacee's currently Single, awaiting for her right one, Seem so long since i've talked to her.
I've lost a friend, But im better off without her.
----

Dumb ending, BUT WHO CARES. i am not born to be a Writer! :D

Just a random picture.

A long lost friend just msged me,

And, we had so much to catch up on, but something's missing,

And i made my friend sad & pissed.

Drained. Getting weaker daily. Again, its back.
I wonder what's the cause this time round.
if Only, i had someone to talk to now.

How i wish, Life's just a fantasy,
No worries, no sadness, no jealousy , no hatred, no bitterness, no sicknesses, No curses.
I would rather be someone that existed in someone's heart but not in reality.
I rather be fake, I rather that i've not even landed here. Why can't i be famous in a way, where no one truely knows me? In a way that, Im not even real?
Worrying just makes me feel, Sad.
Sadness just makes me feel, Lonely.
Loneliness just makes me feel..

IF only, i've never existed.
I know i have been because God has a plan for me.
I know, dont tell me that, But, That's just what im Hoping.

I want to, Love.
Just like how those people did,
I want to fight, like how they do,
I want to slap, like how they slap,
I want to be hugged, Like how they hug,
I want to get married, Like how they got married,
I want to have a child, Like how they got one.

But hey, this is just crap and fantasy.
Its never gonna be real.
Because I AM real.

why not trying to pinch me?

So, what am i suppose to do?

Leave my hair there? I truely regretted.

Now i've gotta tie a bun to school. If not, REMINDS ME SOMEONE.

Cut Short / Rebond / Leave it ? :/

Im confused.

Now :

Before :

------

Short hair

(SWOLLEN EYES)

(ACTCUTE!!)

(FRIGGING LONG HAIR)

(FRIGGING SHORT)

----

Celeb's hairstyle!

-

THIS IS PRETTY!!!

THIS IS PRETTY TOO